Can i not drive my cunt home
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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