carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
