Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
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