She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
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