am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
