I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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