GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize