so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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