Please, let me fuck your mom
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
You pole danced in your parka.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
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