Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
