Fuck appropriateness.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize
