Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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