I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
