my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Randomize
