Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
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