Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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