If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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