If i come over, it means nothing
He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
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We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
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I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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