I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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