I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
My liver just broke up with me...
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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