yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
