and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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