yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
i black out too much to be "responsible"
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