I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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