ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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