so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
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