I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Michael Bay diarrhea
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
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