Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Yo dont text me then not text me
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
