how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
He felt like a one man threesome
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
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