it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
