Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
She even gives head with a lisp.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
