omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
He? As in you personified your dick?
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Randomize
