What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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