using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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