She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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