I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
My breath smells like gin and sadness
there is puke in my bra ... again
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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