"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
