I'm lost and stupid without you.
I need help removing her.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
My breasts were aching with rage.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Randomize
