That's intense
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
