She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
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