It's Friday. Sex?
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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