one word: firstdatebathroomanal
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
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I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Damn victory sex feels great
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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