I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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