we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
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