I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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