we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Randomize
