Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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