mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
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