Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
19 Teachers Share the Funniest Items Brought to “Show and Tell”
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Green mimosas i think yes
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
23 Concerns People Have When They’re About To Have Sex With Someone New
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
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