My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
