those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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