So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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